Saturday, 15 September 2007

Welcome to my new blog! Overdue update

Hello to my multitude of fans, and welcome to my brand new blog! The bastards at the Warwick Graduate Association want to charge me 20 pounds a year, which is ridiculous, and so here is the result: my brand new blog. All my readers are in for such a treat, for I have so much to say. So much has happened in the last three months or so.

I think the first event was note was Final Fling. I was greatly looking forward to this, and it didn't disappoint. The weather was on the tempremental side, and wellington boots were the order of the day, but the damp conditions could not dampen our spirits. I managed to experience most of the theme park rides without puking, though I do admit to a slight queasiness when stumbling off The Trembling TeaCups, a ride not for the faint hearted. One incident of note which I found quite amusing was seeing a fellow reveller hurl her guts up uncontrollably for at least 10 minutes. She was finally helped out by someone as me and JD watched in amusement.

The end of term was a much more emotional occasion, as we witnessed the end of the Lucky 77 household. Walking around the empty house, which was by now a mere shell of its former glorious existence, was a sombre and distressing experience. It gave me time to reflect on the gay times I had had at the mansion. The fun, the frolics, the frivolities. I remember one time early in the third term, whilst playing poker at 4 in the morning, hearing a noise outside the window. Upon turning my head, I saw a scraggily and unkempt youth who quickly asked me 'Got a joint mate'. Ah, the memories. Here is a picture of the rubbish outside the house after the kitchen had been emptied; I'm sure you'll agree this sea of waste even rivals the rubbish created by the home ground at Coventry City home game (see photo at the top).

The first few weeks of my Summer were taken up milking the cows, collecting the eggs and trimming the neighbours' overgrown crysanthenums. I also found myself in the pub most evenings, and early most mornings come to that. On the poker front, I invested in a new set-up, including a nice new monitor, new computer, new optical mouse and 10GW computer cooling system. With all of this assembled, I was ready to play!

Late August, I travelled to Torquay to play in the Golden Sands Festival. It would be a good chance to catch up with Rick, Scott and Parsy. There were a few events, but the one I had my eye on was the 50 rebuy. I built up a huge stack in this, and made it to the final table confident of a victory (3k) as second in chips, but still with only 12BB. Then this hand came up: the chip leader at the table raises, I shove with A4o, and he calls with AT. gg me. Slightly saddened with this development, I decided to sit in the 1/2 PL cash game, and who else should be at the table but Charalambos Xanthos. He obviously fancied himself a bit, as he was bossing the table. It was then that we played the following pot. I make it 8 to go with KsQs, and he makes it 25 from the SB. So I then make it 70, and he flatcalls. Flop comes down 9xx with two spades, and he checks. I bet 120 and he check-raises all in for 300. I'm getting about 3-1 on the call, and so call. The turn and river come T, T, and he taps the table saying 'you're good'. I wait for him to muck, but he declines, and he shows AsJs for Ace high for a 700 pound pot. Nice.

About a week later, I make the trip to London for the annual GSOP extravaganza. There were 7 of us from Warwick in the 100 freezeout, and these were: Davey Lu, Myself, Jambon, Flash, JD, Gary Fernandes and Dhruv 'The Kid' Doshi. Expectations were running high. I found myself on a starting table with Gutshot's very own loud-mouthed, super-egoed Ade Bayo. A few hands in, we play the following pot (the blinds are 25/50, stacks are 4k). Ade makes it 400 to go, and I find JJ in late position and pop it up to 1500. Ade flat calls. The flop comes down Axx, and we check it down to the river, when he flips over his TT, and I rake the pot. He then starts mouthing off at me, so I ask him if he was playing his tens for set value, and remind him that he just called off almost half of his stack in the first level. He soon shuts his mouth.

As an aside, Ade Bayo is the loudest, rudest most arrogant 'player' I have ever had the misfortune of playing against. He is a disgrace of a human being, and one of the worst players at Gutshot (which isn't saying much). He has a complete lack of understanding of the most basic fundamentals of the game, and he covers his incompetence by screaming the room down. I understand that the only reason his behaviour is accepted is because he tips so generously. Its nice to see that money can buy someone a pass to perform like a monkey. His dress sense reminds me of a flower-bed, covered in compost, and urinated on by 4 drunks returning home after a piss-up. I only say this because he had a go at my 'lol donkaments T-shirt'. In fact, whilst his chat is irritating, he seems like an affable enough chap.

Anyway, back to the tourney. I'm nickling and diming, dodging and weaving, playing out of my skin. Then I come across a character called Shane at my table. I know I just ripped it into Ade, but my God. I thought I had stumbled into a zoo full of screaming schoolkids. The noise this guy makes is just unbelievable. Anyway, I slowplay my aces against his 96 to double up, and then try and shut out the din as the tournament continues. Suddenly we are down to the last 2 tables, and still in, apart from myself, is Dave Lu, The Dosh, Flash and Gary. A truly great achievement by the Warwick lads. At the break, we strike a few deals (mostly just for rooting purposes/good karma) and then go back to the tables. I am raising lots of pots and taking lotsof blinds, encountering little resistance. In fact, after the tournament, one of the dealers told me that he was counting how many chips I was accumulating.

On the other table, Flash has just moved in and I hear Shane shout out 'I've caught Flash with his pants down'. With ten players to go (one before the final table), someone suggests taking some money off first for tenth. Obviously, I refuse, and before long we are on final. Gary is the first player to drop, and Shane doubles up. He then decided to go on a verbal rampage, swearing and abusing the players at the table. When he tells me that he's going to bust me, I came out with the line 'your ego is writing cheques your ability can't cash'. I call over the TD soon after to complain about the disgraceful hectering from Shane, but he was inept and ambivalent. To be honest, I expected nothing more. Later on, I got another ruling when he tried to encourage Lu to collude, but once again, my best intentions were quickly rebuffed by the TD (who, funnily enough, Flash and I saw pouring money into a slot machine at the Empire Casino a couple of weeks later; enough said). I inevitably bust Shane from the tourny soon after, my AK > JJ, and then he reshoved me with QT against with AQ with no fold equity. There were 4 of us left at this point: me, Lu (who had been marshalling his big stack with aplomb), Dru (who was playing solid as ever) and a random called Mike Marquez (who I had pegged as a good player). Dru ended up coming 4th, and the three of us then chopped it for 2.5k each. After being advised 'not to forget the dealers' by the TD, I could not forget the shambolic way I had been treated, and so left them 20 quid for the privilege of playing poker in a sauna. Thanks to JD for fetching me cups of tea throughout, and Jambon for keeping me amused whilst standing behind, encouraging me to continue with the rape and pillage.

The day after, myself, JD, Jambon, Dave and Flash played some tennis, and then had a meal. Whilst ordering this, I decided to celebrate yesterday's result by ordering a bottle of Champagne. However, the lady behind the counter obviously believed that due to our physical prowess, Lucozade was more appropriate, and thought that I was joking when I asked for a bottle of bubbly. Despite disapproving looks from the queue behind, I eventually convinced her that I was for real (I think the roll of nifties in my hand may have had something to do with this).

I returned the day later for a cricket match back in Devon. I thought this would be a nice, relaxing experience, but once again things came to a head. After rebuffing a little sledging (whilst batting) things got heated between myself and an opposition fielder, who referred to me as a 'fat twat'. I retorted 'Calm down, old boy. You'd better watch your blood pressure or you'll end up having a heart attack', and then he came right up to me, put his face in mine, and said 'I'll see you afterwards'. Needless to say, being the diplomat that I am, things were smoothed over and no bones broken.

A couple of weeks later I travelled up to London to see Flash, and visit The Empire Casino where the WSOPe was taking place. It was good fun to see the big names in the flesh (rather more of it than you may imagine in the case of a certain young female online pro's posterior - clearly mkind is a believer in the philosophy that girls' fat behind make the world go round, and also in the case of a certain young American online superstar, who may or may not have finished second in the Aussie Millions), and we even asked Gus if he fancied taking myself and Flash on, with Patrick, at a game of tennis. Once again, our physically impressive appearances resulted in intimidation, and Gus politely declined, adding that he would be happy to play us at a Backgammon Pairs with Patrick, but he was running low on cash.

Its hard to discuss my emotions on my blog (especially in keeping with the tradition of the stiff British Upper Lip), but I thought I would write this last paragraph anyway as I weep into my keyboard. The day after seeing the pros in action, Flash and I decided to play some online poker. It was the first event of the WCOOP, and expectations were certainly running high. However, whilst most of the night is a blur, I stumbled into bed bewildered, bedraggled and bemoaning my poker misfortunes having been put through the ringer. The poker was very intense, with a lot of tough spots, and I found myself having to fold sets and overpairs, misclicking myself out of 30BB in one tournament, and shoving with 35o and seeing it fail to hold up in another tournament. It was a night to forget. When Flash's Dad asked how the poker had gone the morning after, I was far from the jocular young man I had met on the previous occasion, and as I wiped a tear from my eye, I vomited in the cats litter tray.

I am currently in Leamington visiting Dave and Lauren, and we are going to plant a garden on their balcony tomorrow. At least the view will be slightly better when Lauren looks out of the window in the future. We can currently see The Polish Centre from the window; at least we know where to go if our shoes need a buffering.


stabec said...

Best news I have had all summer!

Dhruv Doshi said...

Good stuff tommo will keep my eye on your blog! Being looking at your old blog for a while looking for updates!
Post on your old blog (if you still can) that you have moved address.

Also make sure Flash does the odd post or two, would be nice to hear him express himself!!

Good luck with the new blog!

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